I've spent a good part of this week thinking about my recent experience at Nationals, trying to figure out what I was missing. I saw and talked to lifers who have been going for decades and wondered why I, who loves bowling as much as they do, did not feel compelled to follow in their footsteps. A nagging feeling lingered with me that that this wasn't quite worth the time and expense. I watched squad after squad of good-to-terrible bowlers and wondered what they understood that I didn't. Then it hit me - this looks like any other league night, only bigger and longer.

Apparently, I had been seduced by the very thing I warned non-bowlers about when I told them I would be participating in "The National Tournament", that your participation in it was a function of your ability to pay the USBC sanctioning fee, not your ability to bowl. I did not heed my own counsel and adjust my expectations accordingly. Thus, I was shocked to see so many people suffer such inconvenience to bowl badly, and felt even more disconnected from the shared experience of what is a truly unique and special event.

But this is all, in the end, my problem. Part of it is that I'm not a gambler by nature, so a large part of the Reno experience is lost on me. I do like to drink and eat, and I dutifully availed myself of the all-you-can-eat prime rib buffets and plentiful watering holes. (Twice on this trip, I walked into a casino lounge and had a disorienting sense of deja-vu, until I realized that I, in fact, HAD been in these places before during my other pass through Reno, a one-night stop in '04. Freaking bizarre.) Ultimately, with no posse or significant other to roll/get into trouble/engage in sexual congress with, my indulgences left me a little fatter, more hung over than normal, and with no interesting story to tell. And I like having stories to tell.

The bowling itself was, naturally, the best part. Though I was registered for singles and doubles, I did not have a team to bowl with. At the registration desk, there is a board listing the names and numbers of all those needing a sub or looking to sub. I picked one at random (the prime ingredient in any good story) and hooked up with a crew of guys from New Haven, CT. I instantly liked them better than any of the Gainesvillians that were in attendance, if for no other reason that they were louder, cursed more, and had accents that reminded me of every Scorcese movie I've ever seen.

The shot was tight, with no comeback outside. I played straight up the 8 board with a soft hand, had good reaction, hit the pocket the whole time, and could not make a spare to save my life. I was as if the cathedral-like atmosphere of the stadium (a true spectacle of a bowling venue, and not to be missed if one has the chance) rendered my spare shooting system useless by means of some spatial-disorientation light refraction. Or I just sucked that day, whichever. I did redeem myself with a 246 in the last game to hit 600 on the nose. Felt OK with that. The New Haven guys were OK with that, too.

After that, it was more food and drink, singles and doubles with the G'ville crew (where I made some spares, shot just under six for both, didn't stink out the joint, and was generally bored by the people of my city), and a rendezvous with the CT people at their casino. Unfortunately for my love of adventure, they had completely wrecked themselves the night previous and were in no condition to do anything other than sit at a blackjack table. Fine by me, as I could drink for free as long as I kept up the pretense that I, too, was gambling. But no good stories come from pretending. Best I could do was drink until my flight left at 7:45AM Tuesday morning, which is what I did. Not the best idea I've had by some stretch.

After I got back, I couldn't shake the notion that the "prestige" of the event was totally lost on me. It seems to me that it would be a better investment of my time and resources to bowl in some PBA regionals - I could do two or three for the price of one trip to Nationals. I would still testing myself in tournament conditions on harder oil shots with tougher competition, and if I cashed it would be something I'd be more proud of.

Jesus, now I'm sounding like a sore-headed old crank like tenpingirl or bkernan. If it's part of a larger vacation, I could see Nationals being a yearly event worth pursuing. My folly was not planning enough stuff around nine games of bowling. Next time I'm bringing a map, more money, and a woman.

(By the way, mad shout-outs to my new peeps in New Haven - Pat McC., Chad A., Andy V., Henry P., Bob B., Frank B. L. Jr., Doug C., Rocky D., and especially Rich DiPalma, for answering the phone and saying c'mon down. Stay classy.)